Ep #92: Money Coach, Heal Thyself: Untangling Emotion from Income

Hey coach, what if feeling everything, all the feelings about money, wasn't actually a problem, but was your greatest power? I'm Kendall, and in this episode of The Money Coach School Podcast, we're getting into what it means to be money clean, meaning not shut down or zen 24/7, as if that were even possible, but clear, grounded, and unshakable in your income decisions, even when the emotions are loud.

Because when you stop letting fear or urgency or self-doubt run the show, your pricing shifts. Your offers hit different. Your results start stacking. So let's clean up your money emotions and make your money moves unstoppable. It's all here for you in this episode of The Money Coach School Podcast. Let's dive in.

Welcome to The Money Coach School Podcast. To really excel at coaching women, you have to be skilled, confident, and even fearless at money coaching. If you're passionate about women holding genuine money power and love supporting women entrepreneurs, then this is the show for you. Now, here's your host, money feminist Kendall SummerHawk.  

Hello, beautiful coach. Let's talk about something that is so obvious to all of us women. Money is emotional. And that doesn't make you disempowered. It doesn't mean you're broken or in need of healing or anything else negative. It makes you human. It means you feel, and that's powerful.

But you know what does drain your financial empowerment? Letting that emotion steer your coaching business and your decisions.

So today we're diving into what I call being money clean, which is how to untangle the feelings from the facts without numbing out, without emotional bypassing, or pretending that money doesn't matter to you. Because being emotionally intelligent with money doesn't mean shutting down. It means you stop letting fear or shame or urgency hijack your pricing or hijack your offers or your income decisions, and of course, ultimately, your power.

And when you learn how to get money clean, your pricing shifts, your offers land differently, and you make decisions that build real wealth in your bank account in a way that feels like you.

So what does money clean actually mean? Being money clean does not mean you're calm and you're like in this detached Zen Monk 24/7 state. That's not realistic. That's not what we're after. And it also doesn't mean being immune or numbing out to the pressure that can show up around money.

It is about this. You feel the emotion, but you don't collapse into it. You see the thought or notice the thought, but you don't take orders from it or you don't let it drive your decisions. You notice the urge, but you don't collapse your power to please or fix or hustle.

So that's what being money clean is. It's clear. It's grounded. It's what women coaches need if you're serious about premium clients, powerful coaching, and of course, sustainable, high-earning income.

It's you leading with consciousness instead of reactivity, which by the way, is a requirement if you want to build a premium, sustainable coaching business.

So, I've identified three signs that you're making money decisions from emotion, not from a place of power. And let me walk you through a few ways these show up.

Sign number one: You lower your prices or you overdeliver because you feel bad for charging more. This happens so fast. It's like you're on a consult call, a discovery session, your prospective client, she hesitates, you instantly start discounting in your mind or stacking bonuses just to, quote, "make it worth it."

That's not clean. And it's actually not even generosity. Because instead of anchoring into your value and the value that she's going to receive from your coaching, you're trying to fix her money discomfort by abandoning yourself. You're trying to ease her discomfort at the cost of your value. Yeah, don't do that.

All right, sign number two. You take on a client that you know isn't aligned, isn't right for you, because you feel afraid to say no to the money. I get it. In the early days of my business, I did this more than once, and it never worked out.

And this is the emotional tug of war that often sounds like, "Well, maybe it won't be so bad. I can just manage it." Or, "What if I don't get another yes this month?" Usually for me, I would say, "Well, it won't be so bad. I can handle it. It'll be okay."

No, it's not going to be okay. All that type of inner negotiation is scarcity wrapped in logic. And it costs you, not just in time, but in energy, in trust with yourself, and then the space that client now takes up that was really meant for someone else who was actually your perfect fit client.

All right, sign number three. You spiral after hearing one no. You spiral, meaning you question your rates, you rewrite your whole offer, you tell yourself maybe you should launch something else entirely, you doubt everything. That's kind of my go-to.

All from one no? Seriously? That's not strategy, that's a nervous system flare-up. And recognizing this as a nervous system reaction means you don't use it to make your business decisions. And that's where money clean work becomes your edge that you go to instead of shrinking from.

I want to touch on numbing out, because numbing out is also not an answer. So, let me be clear. Some women hear this and they try to overcorrect. They shut down, they ignore their bodies, they silence their intuition, and they relabel it strategy. I actually call it "boss babe disassociation." But that's not clean. That's avoidant.

You do not need to bulldoze your feelings to be successful. And believe me, you probably won't be successful trying to bulldoze your feelings. I'm a Taurus with Scorpio moon and Scorpio rising. If anybody knows about trying to bulldoze feelings, it's me. I'm here to tell you, it doesn't work. In fact, the most powerful women that I coach inside of Secret Energy of Money, they feel deeply. They just don't let those feelings make their money decisions.

They don't outsource their power to urgency. They allow the emotion without trying to fix anything or circumvent it, and they don't try to make decisions from that emotionally charged place. They get coaching with me so that they can act from clarity, not chaos.

So here's what you can do instead, which is how to get money clean in real time. And this is a very, very simple practice that I teach inside Secret Energy of Money. When you feel the emotional swirl coming up, pause and ask, "What's the actual decision here?"

And then partner it with this question, "What's the story I'm telling about it?"

Let me give you a couple of examples. So, let's say the fact is you didn't hit a launch goal. And the story I'm telling about it is, "No one wants this. I need to change everything." That's usually my go-to.

Or another example is a client said no to your premium rate. And then you start a story of saying, "Maybe I'm too expensive."

You see how fast the story spirals?

Getting money clean means separating fact from fiction, separating the number from an internal narrative that tries to take over, separating a result you experienced from your sense of self-worth. None of those things have anything to do with each other.

Your brain is going to want to collapse all of it into this one messy identity crisis. Don't let it do that. This is where money clean becomes non-negotiable. You separate fact from fiction. You separate data from drama. And you choose power over panic.

So instead, you drop into your body, you breathe, you get present, and you breathe again. And you can ask yourself this question. You can ask, "As I trust myself completely in this moment, what is a new possibility that I can consider?"

That is your money clean move. That is where clean money decisions come from.

You know, emotion is data. Use it, but just don't drown in it. Let's be clear, your emotions around money, they're not wrong to have them. It's okay. But they're not your CEO either. Emotion is data, not a directive.

So for example, if you're feeling scarcity, maybe that's because you're stretching into something new. That often happens for me. I'm always challenging myself, creating new programs, wanting to grow my business. So yeah, scarcity kicks in because it's scary for me to do new things, even though I do new things all the time.

Let's say you're feeling guilt. It might mean an old identity is trying to take over when you're saying, "You know what? I'm done with that." Maybe you're feeling fear, and that can be because you're standing at the edge of expansion.

So this is the kind of money work that isn't about spreadsheets, although the results of it will show up in your spreadsheets in a very positive way. It's not in spreadsheets, it's not present on Instagram memes, it's in how you choose.

And this is what we do inside Secret Energy of Money. We don't just set income goals, we shift the identity behind your goal. We coach through new pricing, we coach through income plateaus, we coach through messy client dynamics, actually my favorite. We coach through money shame. We coach through things like, "Oh, I should be farther along," or, "I'm not sure I can hold more." We coach through all of it, all through the lens of money.

Everything you want to shift in your business, we coach on through the lens of money, and this gets you money clean. You get clear. You get intentional. You get clean so that the money you make is on purpose. It's not panic-driven.

All right. So if your income goals feel heavy, if you keep second-guessing your pricing, if you're done feeling like money is either a total mystery or feeling like it's a constant pressure point, if income feels unpredictable or pressure-filled, then it's time to get money clean because the women who lead with clarity, who can feel everything without letting those emotions run the show, they're the ones building real wealth. And that's what we do inside Secret Energy of Money.

This is your edge. This is your next level. You get to be rich and resourced. I love that. We work on pricing, we work on offers, we work on so many different things, all through the lens of money.

So definitely check it out at SecretEnergyOfMoney.com. And remember that money coaching changes lives, starting with yours.

Oh, and one quick ask before we wrap up here. If this episode spoke to you, would you do me a huge favor? Would you leave a five-star review on Apple Podcast? I know it takes a couple of minutes. Apple doesn't make it easy, but it helps me so much be able to reach more ambitious, soulful women like you who are ready to lead and earn with purpose.

I would really appreciate that. And thank you in advance for that. And thank you for listening and your loyalty. It means everything to me. All right. So until next time, stay powerful.

Thank you so much for tuning into this week's episode of The Money Coach School Podcast. If you enjoyed this podcast, make sure you follow so you never miss an episode. Also, I would so love and appreciate if you would leave a 5-star review. Your review supports women just like you in discovering all of the juicy tips and insights I’m sharing here on how to coach women on money.

And if you want to learn how to excel at coaching women on money, definitely go to KendallSummerHawk.com and check out the wealth of money coach trainings that we have for you. Thanks so much for being part of this money coaching movement and for tuning into the show every week.